I suggest
we post Dustin Guenther Facts. Here are a couple to start things off:
1. Dustin doesn't sleep, he does homework.
2. Once Dustin almost turned his homework in late. However, that was the day when time stopped.
3. Dustin counted to infinity. An infinite number of times. Ad infinitum. Twice.
4. Electrons are entangled because of Dustin's hair.
5. Fortunately, no one's invented a quantum computer. Otherwise, Dustin would have to charge royalties.
6. UCI moved to California in order to accept Dustin.
posted by Eric @ 24.1.06
12 comments
12 Comments:
The other day, Dustin solved an equation and a mathematician was instantly vaporised.
Dustin doesn't sleep: Dustin studies.
Universities use Dustin as a supreme example of an over-achieving student.
The corollary to #6 is that he turned them down.
Dustin thinks so hard that he speeds up the rate of entropy in nearby objects. This is evidenced by the fact that any car which Dustin buys quickly deteriorates on a molecular level.
When Dustin stares at a difficult physics problem for 24 hours straight, the numbers start to shift to form the answer. Note that this only works for difficult ones; easy ones tremble after 2 hours and reform in the shape of a sonnet.
Although most people think that kittens come from cats, the truth is that they miraculously appear from Dustin's hair collecting in the shower.
Wow, Katie has remained unscathed. Good job, gentlemen!
I like the car one, Phil. So true!
Dustin doesn't need to study Physics. Physics needs to study Dustin.
There are no laws of physics. There is only Dustin.
Dustin found out that Einstein's theories of Relativity were wrong, but he's too modest to let everyone know. That's because it turns out that everything isn't relative to the speed of light: everything is relative to Dustin.
This also explains why Dustin has so many relatives.
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